It's the 22nd. Of December. I haven't done any Christmas shopping. At all. It's almost 1pm right now. I haven't even gotten out of my pajamas. To make matters worse, I'm at my parents' house. And we all remember what happened last time I was here!
So, I have an aunt who has mental problems...some I secretly suspect she brought upon herself, but whatever. She decided that because she's run her family into a mountain of debt from all her mental shenanigans, they didn't have enough money for Christmas this year. (However, they just bought a new car.) So my Grandmother and my other aunt decided that we could just have a fun, light-hearted, white elephant exchange.
*sigh*
I hate white elephant crapchanges. And now because my aunt has spent the last decade being a selfish "mentally ill" skank, I have to suffer.
WHY????!!!!!! I DID NOT DO ANYTHING TO DESERVE THIS!!!!!!!!!
Maybe I'll be athiest for Christmas so I don't have to participate.
"Grandma and Grandpa, Uncles and Aunts, Cousins and that one 1st-Cousin-Once-Removed, I no longer believe in God. I believe in Science. As such, I cannot participate in your white elephant crapchange this year." This will, of course be followed by weeping, wailing, and the typical gnashing of teeth. But, I will not be moved by such emotion and will hold fast to my belief in Science forever until the crapchage is over.
This is the best idea I've ever had.
4 comments:
I don't know...remember what happened to Victor Frankenstein?
How about just telling them that since they've been naughty, you're not getting them anything and instead you're going to spend the money you would have spent on them on yourself? Would that work?
How'd the crapchange go?
How come you haven't posted anything? We want to know! We want to know!
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