I had every intention of writing a long treatise este noche about how I hate men, what they do to piss me off, how I'm better than practically everybody (except for all of you who read this blog, of course), and how generally cranky I am about not being able to control the universe, etc., etc.
However, I had a very remarkable and drawn out incident involving a pair of painfully cute rubber boots, a hack saw, a deserted running trail, a torrent of rain, and bamboo.
Suffice it to say that I don't have enough time at this point to tell you in detail the very latest drama (real or imagined) in my life.
I do have time to quickly tell you a short, but painful story: I let SOAPM go to church with me a couple of weeks ago and....
*sigh*
this is so hard....
he wore...I don't even know how to say this...
he wore....
WHITE SOCKS WITH DRESS SHOES! *clunk* (sound of my head hitting the keyboard in exasperation)
It's all enough to make a girl want to run and throw her beautiful, voluptuous form into the nearest body of water.
Instead, I chose to donne my cute rubber boots and carry a hacksaw through a rainstorm. Probably a healthier choice, however bizarre.
So, please don't stop giving me attention just because I've been neglectful. Please! I need your attention more than the very breath of life!
No, I'm serious.
8 comments:
Did I miss something, Queenie? I thought you kicked him to the curb. Now going to church again with him? Ur...? Huh??
Was he doing it to be ironic? Or does he simply have poor taste. In clothes, not ladies.
Cach - He is kicked to the curb! But, when he asked to go to church with me, I felt a little satonic telling him he couldn't go, so I took the high road. Apparently, it was the wrong choice.
Grant Miller, I WISH he was trying to be ironic. But no. He was not. Ironic I could appreciate, bad fashion sense I can only loath.
Sounds like Saton to me, Qiii. With your big, bushy head.
There's some attention for you. Is this like feeding the seals at Sea World? Are you satisfied or do you want more?
I'm satisfied. I'm serious this time.
I think you mean satin. ;-)
Or whatever.
Queen, I love the image of you hacking down bamboo in a violent rain storm in hott galoshes. If this were a perfect world, you would have developed a fever and swooned, and a gallant and ruggedly handsome young man (a complete blackguard, of course) would have thundered up on a stallion to sweep you to safety. Sigh.
You would have eventually come to a bad end, though (worse than death, stillborn bastard child, living out the rest of your days in a remote Italian convent, yadda, yadda, yadda). So it's probably just as well.
Oh queen, can't you see? You can neglect us, your fans, and still...we come back for more...we're addicts!
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