Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Letter to Myself from Myself, part xxo

Dear Queen the third,

*sigh* You know, I really am ashamed of how undedicated you've been to your blog as of late. The thing is, you entertain me! I love you so, so much. And I know that you can't blog at work anymore - and, really, that does suck. But, let's be serious for a minute here: how long does it honestly take to write a funny, witty, clever blog entry that I will want to read over and over again?? It's not as if you spend much time proofreading!! (Possibly, none at all.)

Additionally, your ridiculous and frivilous actions make everyone feel better about their lives, and you have not been very diligent in sharing as of late. For example, there may be people who have really crappy boyfriends who don't buy them Tiffany's as often as they should. Those people can just read an entry or two and realize, "Well, hell! At least my man isn't in jail!" and all the pain and frustration of their inadequate realationship goes away!

Or, when they have to wake up at 7:45am to get to work by 9 am, they can say to themselves, "At least I don't have to wake up at 6:30!!!"

So, you see, Queen, what you do is closely related to the work of Mother Teresa and/or the Pope. And of all the sins you commit on a daily basis, not sharing what a fool you are with everyone else is by far the biggest!!

I chastise thee, Queen, III!! No more chocolate Dr. Pepper floats for you, Missy! You're punished.

And remember, I'm only doing this because I love you.

With all the sincerety I can muster,


Queen, III

4 comments:

Tracy said...

I, for one, have missed thee, Qiii.

xxo,
Starshine

Queen, III said...

Thanks, Starshine!! ;)

Fork said...

Maybe you should let Taraji take over for a few days. The adorableness potential there is way high.

Queen, III said...

are you trying to say that I'm not adorable?!!!