From some of the reactions to one of the questions in my last blog entry, it has come to my attention that some of you think that accepting my Italian ex-boyfriend's offer to detail and wax my car is, wrong "on so many levels." I feel like this needs to be addressed.
I don't think that I need to remind anybody that he totally didn't deserve me. Also, we ended our relationship on good terms. We've kept in constant contact since the break up! If he wants to wash and wax my car, then I don't want to stop the boy!!
I know what you're all saying, "Queen, it's obvious that he wants more from you!!" Pish posh!!! You obviously don't know my Italian ex-boyfriend! He has the sex drive of a one-eyed sloth. I know. I dated him for 2 1/2 years. 2 1/2 YEARS!!!!!!! I think I know what my Italian ex-boyfriend wants by now. Also, Italian ex-boyfriend was not a very complex fellow. What you see is what you get with Italian ex-boyfriend, which isn't a lot, but at least he doesn't pretend to be something he's not.
So, to all of you who think that his waxing my car is some elaborate plot to regain my love, you are sadly mistaken! He didn't want my love to begin with - I MADE HIM TAKE IT!!! (He's always been kind of week.)
Also, I've suspected for a long time that he was actually in love with my car (which, by the way is hott!), so really when you think about it, I'm doing HIM a favor.
9 comments:
Sing it, Queen!
Ahhhh... foolish mortal. For all of the supposed dating experience, you know nothing about men.
There was a moment so truthful that came out of "Dumb and Dumber" that I'm shocked to admit it. It goes like this:
LLOYD
What do you think the chances are of a girl like you and a guy like me ending up together?
MARY
Not good.
LLOYD
You mean not good, like one out of a hundred?
MARY
I'd say more like one out of a
million.
LLOYD
So you're telling me there's a
chance?
BOYS ARE DUMB. Letting Italian Ex-boyfriend wax your car is only leaving the door open for him. It's like testing anthrax on mice. The victim doesn't know any better and usually gets mangled. BOYS ARE DUMB!!!
Don't forget queen...Even though i'm half a world away...I was behind you from the start. Let the boy wax the car. You're a big girl. Don't let the cachinnator's illogical fear of the male sex scare you. Do what you will...It's your car...your Italian Ex-boyfiend...and your money that is being saved by said dumb Italian Ex-boyfriend. More Power to ya girlfriend (pretend i snapped 3 times when i said that)
Don Boscoe! You are my favorite!! I love you - even though you're half a world away!! Your support is very appreciated!
Cachinnator - I don't think that it's that serious...and besides, if he doesn't do it, it just won't get done. I mean, I don't have any money!
Queen...I'm glad I could be of such support. Any time you need some support against these uptight people you just let me know. And when I get back...August...Me and you can take them on in a full out debate..."Why we're right and you're not!!"
OMG!!! That is the best plan EVER!!! We're totally gonna win! I can't WAIT!!!
Foolish mortals...
He waxes your car, you wax his back.
Sounds fair to me.
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