Okay. That's it!

Giving in to the gentle indiffernce of the world.

I'm fed up. Just sick of it. So, finally, after months of being in complete denial, I'm embracing it: my spinsterhood. The universe is against me. So, much like The Stranger, I'm just going to give in to the gentle indifference of the world. There's nothing left to do.

This is how it works for me: either the guys I go out with are complete emotional fuckwits, or I'm completely and totally repulsed by them, OR (and this is the real clincher) they'll be hot on my trail, I won't be that interested, and then because of their persistence, I'll think, "Well, maybe so and so isn't such a bad guy. Sure, let's date!" and the vagina runs the other way. This sucks. So, I give up. I give in. To the gentle indifference of the world. It's great.

But, the good news is, that whilst I may never, never, never, never, never know the joys of companionship, I'll be able to do lots of things that a girl in a commited relationship might find a little difficult.

I'll be able to wake up early to go run miles upon miles to train for that marathon I keep saying I'm going to run without being tired because no one will be trying to make sweet love to me! I'll be able to rent whatever movie I want! I'll be able to have random make-out sessions with guys I don't even know and won't have to worry about my boyfriend finding out! I'll be able to lust freely after T.O. without anybody saying stupid things like, "You don't even know T.O." or "T.O. has a girlfriend."! I'll be able to lie around in my underwear all day without anyone judging me! I'll be able to focus wholeheartedly on my career!

This is going to be great! Go me! I love spinsterhood! And let me just say thank you to all the emotional fuckwits, vaginas and repulsive idiots who got me to this place: without you, I'd be happy, contenteded, and completely unmotivated. Angry, bitchy, and driven is SO much better.