I head to the bathroom this morning and notice, whilst looking in the mirror, that there is a black dot on my forehead. Somehow, without noticing, I wrote all over my forehead with my pen! How is that even possible?
But, away from the point, my office could be the most unfriendliest, unfun office in all the world - with the exception of maybe the offices in Asia. I hear they're not too fun. BUT - the receptionist doesn't even say good morning!! What kind of receptionist doesn't say good moring--even if you make eye contact?
Not our receptionist.
When you walk in, no one says anything to you. I suspect that I could walk in naked, and there would be no response from anyone.
The lawyers get here whenever they want, go to their offices and shut the doors. No one speaks. All day. Even though there are 5 of us basically in the same room.
When someone does speak it's always about something political (usually how they hate Bush) or how someone hates the Dallas Cowboys, or loves the Dallas Cowboys. Whatever. If it were up to me, I'd love the whole NFL! But, no one ever asks me.
What if I was dying?! No one here would care. Chances are, I probably am dying. I could probably die at my desk and be dead all day, and no one would notice.
These people are lovely, charming, gracious people. Just the kind of people you want to spend 8 hours a day with!
So, in the anti-spirit of my office: Have a nice day!!
8 comments:
Uh, Q3, not to alarm you or anything, but, have you checked to make sure there aren't any pirates around? Maybe one left a death warning on your face while you were asleep.
At least you didn't take Stoopid Pills.
Oh wait. Maybe you did. Maybe that's why you wrote all over your face. Quick, try telling someone in your office a joke.
If that doesn't work, you've probably accidentally consumed one.
If I were you, I'd keep drawing on your face until someone notices. Let's see...you could draw a nice still-life painting of apples in a dish. Maybe daisies in spring. A sleeping baby. Do sleeping babies count as still life? I guess if they're dead sleeping babies they would. Right? Ha ha...ha...hm.
OH GOD! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?! I'VE NEVER BEEN SO UN-FUNNY!
I'M A MONSTER!
I hope this doesn't sound trite, but LOL! You guys are cracking me up!! A-dub, thanks for warning me! I never even stopped to think about being paranoid about pirates. This adds a whole new level to my neuroticism! Thanks!
Forky - I'm taking your advice. I'll let you know how "Still Life: because there's no life left" painting on my face goes. It'll look like real babies, but they'll just be marzipan babies.
It's gotta be something like that! Who knows? Maybe she's just a really bad receptionist!
Maybe the receptionist is deaf. Try sign language. Even if you don't know any. And in addition to the still-life face painting, try farting VERY loudly in quiet moments. Don't acknowledge it.
Bakerman - man! Are those some good ideas! I'm going to especially try the farting one!
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