Speaking of Grudge Matches...

A-dub is too funny! Her grudge match concept is intriguing to say the least. I mean, I don't even know what's going to happen!!

But along those lines, I DO have a grudge - against a group of men. Namely, white boys. Now, before you all start sending me hate mail, let me explain. I have a grudge against white boys who don't dig me - probably really I have a grudge against EVERYBODY who doesn't dig me, but the majority percentage of people who don't dig me are WHITE BOYS!! Why? I know not.

I've done some reserach. You see, as many of you know, I've been dating "online." Kind of silly, but it's kept me occupied since the tragic breakup. Anywhose - If I leave my profile - that's online dating terminology - alone and just sit and wait for people to contact me, I'll get a nice racial variety of interested suitors. But here's what happens next: the white boys will email me once or twice, but then stop - and suddenly, too; the black men hold on for dear life; and the hispanic men are fairly indifferent. Now, this is only MY experience but, what on earth could be causing this?! Before, when I went out with men in real life, I just always thought that the reason only "ethnic" men asked me out was because of my voluptuous rear-end. This was, of course, the same reason white boys DID NOT ask me out. But now, they only see a picture of me which doesn't really show off HOW ghetto this booty really is, and the black men flock and the white boys run away, run far, far away!

But, why?! I know my parents were a bit progressive in raising me and that they tried really hard to ensure that we were "colorblind" and not limited to just one culture, but I'm basically a middle-class white girl, so I should be able to pull the white boys just like the other white girls do, right? So, what is it about me that makes me so appealing to some and so revolting to others? I don't understand. Is it because my boobs aren't fake? Is it because I'm so loud and obnoxious? Is it because I look jewish? Is it because I have such a fantastic sense of humor? Is it because I'm not afraid to speak my mind...and then some?

I DON'T KNOW!!! And to tell you the truth, while it hasn't hurt my feelings before, it's kind of hurting my feelings now, which ultimately means that when I get drunk and some poor white boy is even a little bit rude to me at some bar, I'm going to freak out and try to break his jugular. I mean, it's happened before!

My white men, I have a message for you: I know I seem like too much woman, and I know my @$$ is a sizeable one, but maybe you should just try it!! You might like it! And then I won't have to break your jugular...just your heart.